Let me start by telling you that I had the mental picture of the kind of guy I wish to spend the rest of my life with since I was in teens. In my mind, I had a picture of his height, complexion, romantic dexterity (winks), charisma and what have you. I got what I wanted and much more.
Now, let me share with you seven steps that will guide you to know when the right person comes into your life.
1. Picture your future
Whatever you desire and aspire, you can acquire. Our mind is so powerful, it is a great weapon that can make or mar us depending on how we use it. It has the power to connect into the future and prepare for us in advance what we will need. All you need to do is create a beautiful future. What you believe you will receive.
2. Place value on yourself
You can only get your worth in your partner. I mean you only attract your equivalent. Birds of same feather flock together. Great minds think alike. With the picture of the future you have in mind, place value on yourself, and do you worth what you desire? No one wants a liability as a spouse; no one wants a pushover as a partner. Everyone wants someone they can be proud to show-off in the public. So, re-brand yourself for the kind of spouse you want to attract into your life. Re-package, be friendly, sociable and presentable. Always keep a smiling face. Smile is the best make-up ever; you don’t need to pay a dime for it. It’s in you, let the world see you smile your way to success.
3. Believe that true love exists
We learnt from the wise book read all over the world that for every Adam, there’s always an Eve. This means, someone unique has been made for you to love, honour, cherish and grow old with you, finishing strong. Love exists no matter the hurt you’ve been through, love will knock on your door again, and all you need to do is believe that true love exists. Everything else fails but Love never fails. Everything that revolves round us was created by love for our convenience. There is a Great Spirit behind our existence as humans and that Spirit is Love. Just as we have earlier established that whatever you believe works for you, so you cannot experience true love if you don’t believe in its existence. True love exists and you can experience it forever. Extravagant love exists; it is the love that makes you put your partner first; adding value to your spouse’s life. And what ever you sow, you will definitely reap, it is a natural law. You cannot plant corn and expect to harvest cassava, same way, when you approach the school of relationship with the aim of being in love forever, then believe it, work towards it and it will happen.
4. Determine to have the best relationship
In the words of Matthew Ashimolowo, ‘be the best’. I challenge you to dream of the best relationship. Daniel was a great man according to the Babylonian history from the wise book; he achieved much success because he was always determined to stand-out. Whatever you determine with so much focus, you will achieve. Set great standards for your relationship. Do you want to marry a Prince? If yes, be a princess yourself, dress as one, speak as one and walk as one. Read books that help to build relationships, attend seminars and listen to tapes that help you to prepare for your partner.
5. Recognising your partner
Now, it is very easy to recognise your partner. Here are some of the tips that worked for me and will work for you; your partner will:
-complement not contradict your vision
-appreciate not tolerate you
-be proud to show you off in the public
-encourage not pull you down
-enjoy your company
-respect your opinion, not necessarily agreeing with it
-accept and love your people
-stir up your strength and help you overcome your weakness
-not hurt you intentionally
-apologise when they hurt you
-not laugh when you fail
-celebrate your success
-see you as the father/mother of his/her kids
-want to grow old with you
If most of the points above are evident in the person you see, then follow your heart, connect, and reach-out. If the guy is not making the first move, the babe can help him feel more comfortable expressing himself by using what I call Ruth-Boaz strategy. With humility, show him signs that you are comfortable around him, you don’t need to say it, act it, you don’t need to seduce him, that is morally wrong, but you can influence him. Let him know he has something he has been looking for all his life by being the best friend in the world to him. Men want to be married to their best friends, same with women. History has shown us that relationship last longer when best friends get married.
6. Keeping your partner
Getting the right partner is not just it but keeping him/her. Work on your self-esteem, approach life with the attitude that you are the best and that if your partner leaves you today, he/she will miss you greatly because you are valuable. According to a popular saying, you don’t know the worth of what you have until you lose it.
Be confident, don’t be intimidated, don’t be inferior around him/her. Bear in mind that he/she is privileged to have you in his/her life. You are a designer’s make, specially crafted, beautifully structured, don’t believe otherwise.
Whatever you fear happens. It happened to one great man from the east named Job; the wise great book tells us that.
If after practising all these, he/she leaves, then someone better is meant for you. It may hurt but don’t let it be your end. No body is worth you committing suicide for. Put yourself together, for love will call again and you will smile.
7. Roll the wedding bells
Now, both of you can get married. Plan for your future, carry your parents along. If your parents/guardians do not concur initially, don’t lose hope. Many waters cannot quench love. Be united, once both of you are in agreement, you can chase ten thousands, even more. Your parents will come around, because love is strong, can melt the most hardened heart. It worked for me, it will work for you. I look forward to answering your questions and mentoring you to be the next celebrity couple. You will succeed!